22 Weeks Pregnant

This week has been pretty hard.
My mom was here last week, so this week felt a bit more lonely here in Iowa, without her. I felt more aware that I was in brand new state, and that I don't know many people here. And that I don't know anyone well.
On top of that, J was sick for the beginning of the week. So she was incredibly clingy and emotional. She wanted to spend the entire day (for days on end) on my lap. If I did so much as tell her I needed to get up and go to the bathroom, she would stand up, run away, and throw herself on the floor crying. She also wasn't sleeping well at night. The combination of these things was starting to make me question my mommy abilities, particularly in the toddler department.
Then by the end of the week, I somehow re-caught her cold (which I already had a week or two ago!) And I am still sick as I type this. I can't breathe through my nose at all, and I feel like I can't hear because my ears are so full -- its making me dizzy.
Oh and I have a lovely cold sore, to match my cold. Sigh.

So of course I have made zero progress on any of my move-in projects I have in mind. Which is not a huge deal, but it feels kinda annoying.

This week I also had a total emotional freak out over having this baby.
Maybe its hormones. But its definitely real stuff too.
I made some peace with a lot of things so, by the end of the week I'm feeling better than the start. But I still need to make a lot of decisions. And I still need to figure out a lot of logistics with our insurance and such. (I seriously dread that kinda thing.)

One fun thing from the week is that we got our couch! I ordered one from Target.com. And I was really nervous about how it would feel, but I LOVE it!
I need to do a post now on my furniture finds here in Iowa. I found some good stuff!


So that said...

The Belly:
It feels bigger this week, but it measures the same as last time we took a picture. I am starting to feel pregnant. Not the crazy end-of-pregnancy-pregnant. But I think I'm done being able to say "I forget I'm pregnant."

I now weigh about what my pre-pregnancy weight was with J. (I worked really hard in-between pregnancies to reach a healthy BMI.) So that is pretty reassuring, since I like to imagine how much less ginormous I will feel at the end of this pregnancy compared to last time. (Although in reality, I'm probably just gonna feel huge regardless.)

"Come on mom, lets do something fun!"

"Come here already!"

"Lets play with those toys!"

Clothes:
I unpacked my maternity clothes, and decided I have way too many clothes. (Both maternity/maternity usable and regular) So funny, since last time I was pregnant I was so sad to have "no clothes." I mean of course I had to buy clothes last time around, but even once I bought them I felt all limited.
I've been transformed as a person lately. I care so much less about things that used to be so important to me. And it feels fine. I think I just need a lot less stuff in general. (I'm not sure how much that is saying, since I was kinda a stuff-a-holic before.)
But yeah, I think I will be continuing my trend of dresses. But I did unpack a few other things. But I left a lot in the bin too. I just want less to think about when I get dressed.
I also need to figure out a better closet system, in my rented home. I think I may be implementing a new take on my diaper box makeover. Seems to suit me. I'll keep you updated.


Physically:
At the start of the week, I was feeling like getting up from sitting was hard, and I was feeling stiff. But I think a lot of that was due to my muscles getting used to swimming laps again. Cause now at this point, I don't really feel that way anymore.
(Might I add that swimming has been the highlight of my week. It really helped me on all fronts. The endorphins I think did a lot to help calm some of my having-this-baby-nerves. Plus it gives me a nice mommy moment in the morning to get some time to myself --- I come home recharged for my day with J. And not to mention the glorious joy of taking a shower without interruption or concern.)
Sleeping has been a little harder this week, but then again, so has everything, so I don't know what to blame that on exactly. I do wake up at least twice a night to pee.


Food:
I've been cooking more this week. One of my meals with italian sausage gave me my first bout of pregnancy heartburn. Not intense, but there none the less.
The last two days I haven't been up to cooking. But Blake was nice enough to make me some delicious quesadillas.
Saturday the three of us went out to eat at Red Robin, and I treated myself to their freckled lemonade (strawberry lemonade.) I gave myself permission to have quite a few glasses. I got so full on it, I hardly had room for my meal. On the way home my tummy was very displeased. It was threatening lots of scary things, mostly an impending trip to the bathroom. It turned out to be a false alarm. But the feelings I was having the rest of the night from all that sugar was not worth it --- my treating myself turned out to be a mistreating. Good to remember for later!
My brain is too stuffy for me to recall the other stuff I've been eating.
And I can't taste much at the moment anyway.


Baby:
She is suppost to weigh about a pound now. And I can feel her really well now. Blake's gotten to feel her a good number of times now.
I don't notice a pattern to her movements yet. Other than she seems to like to move right around the time I start thinking over dramatic mom things like "Oh no I haven't felt her in a while, I hope she is ok!" It's sweet of her to reassure me like that.
I also can feel her kick or punch, up much higher in my belly than I would have expected. She's nearly to my ribs already. Somehow this surprises me. I feel like that's fast.
Last night she did this crazy push against the bed. I was laying on my side, but with my belly mostly into the bed. And I think she was saying,"Umm no! I need more room!" It felt like she was trying to lift me off the bed!

Still no name picked yet!



Feeling:
Mostly down this week from all the sickness.



J:
When she's sick, she wants momma!
She's feeling a lot better by the end of the week, so she's back to herself, able to play on her own and such.

She's starting to try and tell whole stories now, not just sentences. It still takes me a minute to catch on to what she's talking about, but she's really saying stuff.

She's really into wearing hats. Today she wanted to wear her hooded towel as a "hat" all day. If it fell off, she would get very frustrated and start yelling "hat! hat!" And was happy again once I helped her get it back on.

She knows how to tell me "wake up" when I start falling asleep in my sickness on the couch. (Not sure I like that skill. :) )

She also starts saying any letters she knows now when looking at words, she's trying to spell them out. Its pretty cute.

She's been pretty shy around people since we've moved. I think she's kinda overwhelmed. (Can't blame her, so am I.) I mean when you think about it, everyone she sees is someone she's never seen before. And I think she's a little worried we are gonna leave her behind. (She had a fitful time in the church nursery a bit ago.)
But I think she's kinda warming up. We brought her into the worship part of church with us this week before we took her to the nursery. And i think that helped her know where we are, plus she LOVES music. It was so cute to hear her sing and watch her clap and dance.

We also learned she loves drums! We put in an old Reliant K album in the car and as soon as it came on with all its drumming she was just laughing and laughing. She loves when we turn it on.

And the other day I was singing Jesus Loves Me to her, and she started singing a lot of it with me. It was soo cute and heart melting!

 It looks like we are snuggling.

But she is trying to escape! 

:)

Things I'm Brainstorming

I feel like I've lived in our new place for years, and at the same time I feel like everything is still so new.
Part of this sensation is the fact that I realize everything I do around here is just going to get packed back up in a year or two. So if I don't get stuff decorated in the initial settling in phase, I feel like it won't be worth my time.
My brain keeps telling me, I've already been here long enough now that anything I do from here on out is a waste. This probably has something to do with weird pregnancy nesting hormones getting messed around with in the midst of a move. (Or something! I don't know!)

But I still need to get a handful of things taken care of around here. I have about 4 months to get it done before little girl #2 gets here. Totally doable. I'd just rather get it done sooner than later, so I can enjoy it as long as possible!

So in no real order here are the things I am mulling over:
(Feel free to throw any thoughts you have out there)

• Getting my pantry just right
• Getting my tiny coat closet to function better (But don't get me wrong -- I'm very happy we have one, I just need to make it set up better.)
• Figuring out how to organize my own closet in this rental (Don't have a double closet rod and can't do the type of closet makeover I did last time.) (Current frustration -- tank tops -- where do they go?) (Pondering, if I should just make due, or buy a few more organizational tools.)
• Where to store suitcases (Why don't houses have specific suitcases closets or something? They are always in my way!)
• We need to get the new baby stuff back from Blake's parents & figure out where to keep it
• Deciding where Baby girl #2 clothes will be kept. (Have options -- which is best?)
• Getting our TV stand/toy storage cabinets built for the living room
• Getting my bathroom art done
• Getting my kitchen projects done
• Getting the spare room functional. Its still messy and mostly unpacked

 The spare room needs to function as:

• Sewing Room
• Guitar Space
• Home Office
• Occasional Guest Room (Blow-up Matress)
• Kinda Baby Room (At first the baby will probably just sleep in our room. And since I will be pregnant for half our lease, I figure {unless we stay another year} it will barely be a baby room.) So mostly, I just need to save room for a crib in there.

I also need to be figuring out food for once the baby is here. I remember feeling sooo hungry when J was tiny, and just having to wait until I feed her, burped her, changed her and got her to sleep before I could eat again, and start the whole process once again in a little while.
This time I'm gonna have two! I'm not sure how I will ever get anything into my mouth! And while that may be good for losing the baby weight, it will not be good for my brain, mood, and mommy sanity! So I need to figure out things I can heat up and eat in all of 2 minutes. And I'd like them to be healthy, because I am facing down a deflated baby belly, I just feel more sane eating things that promise to aid in its removal! :)
Dinners I'm cool with coming from the crock pot. But its lunch and breakfast that I'm stumped on.

So I need to be looking into that!

So I have a few things to figure out! My brain is having a hard time focusing down on one, and I am not getting all that much figured out jumping around endlessly. I thought maybe if I write it down, I'd have better focus. At least I can stop thinking, "Now what were all the things I needed to do?"

More Pregnancy Pictures

Normally, I had been doing my entry about the week that just past, and including a photo of Day 1 of the next week.

I posted early this last time, so I'm kinda in limbo for this photo.

So I will ramble.

First off, you may have noticed that I did not make a big fuss over hitting 20 weeks and how I'm now officially half way done.

This is because, no matter how mathematically correct that would be, I have learned through experience, that emotionally speaking 20 weeks is NOT the halfway point.

In pregnancy, time slows down dramatically towards the end. And so somehow the end lasts entirely longer than the beginning!

So I think I may feel halfway done around 30 weeks.

Then again, I really want to call 40 weeks half way done, because with J, those two weeks I went past my due date lasted approximately 50 years.

But I've been trying to talk #2 into coming out at 38 weeks. 

(A girl can dream right?)

I mentioned before, that since my photos from last time around look so different between 20 and 22 weeks, I thought my belly would be growing soon. 

I was right. 

Since my last belly post, last three days ago, my belly has grown a whole inch (after holding steady for almost a month.)

 I could feel it. It felt so tight and even a little heavy, just in the belly. (No weight gain though)

 And I feel bigger. 

                                    2012                                                                       2010

I'm realizing, that its all about to start rolling in -- the pregnancy bigness.

Last time we forgot to get pictures between week 22 and week 27 and looking at the two of them...wow, did I ever get bigger during those weeks.

So, yeah. 

Belly here we come!

I guess I should get around to unpacking my maternity clothes now.

Thing is, I've been happily wearing the same 5 or so dresses with leggings every day.

I'm thinkin those maternity shirts folded up in a bin right now, are pretty much a total waste on me at this point. I'm a dress-a-holic. And I think I'm gonna stay that way for the pregnancy and at least this entire summer/fall after baby is here. I don't see the point in missing out on the comfort. Plus they are really just so flattering. And post baby, so easily to keep up with size-changing-wise.

But I do have a few more dresses tucked away in bins. I should get those out now ---before its too late. Save yourself. (Ok ignore me. I'm tired and slap happy.)

J likes to touch my belly (or often times she gets confused and goes for the boobs) and say "baby!"

She's not too gentle with the belly. I usually can't stop her from climbing all over it before she starts crushing me and #2. I keep telling myself that I'm pretty sure God knew toddlers would be doing this to  mommy bellies, so there must be enough cushion in there to keep #2 safe durning the moments before I can remove said toddler from belly bouncing.

Her new thing is to say "Hi" to anything and everything by name and then say "what doing?" 

(aka. whatcha doing?)

"Hi Big Bear! What doing?"

"Hi Potty! What doing?"

(Potty is obviously the potty. But she also calls her teapot, Mrs. Pots (from Beauty and the Beast) Potty. She says hi to both. Pretty funny!)

Here she is standing on the scale today and air washing her hands.

Ok I should go take a nap.

J has been sick with a cold and keeping me from sleep.

I owe it to #2 to get some.

Talk to you later.

Lydia

Back in the Pool Again

Ah swimming. How did I forget how wonderful you are!?

Its been way longer than I thought, since I last swam. I wasn't able to do it while Blake was finishing his PhD because he was working such late hours. I couldn't ask him to get up and watch J at 6am, when he had been working till 4am. And our pool was only open early mornings or lunch time. (Lunch time = no babysitter.) So I just waited until we moved and life got simpler.

But even here with my new pass set up, every time I thought about getting in the car and driving to the pool (or worse yet, waking up early to get in the car and drive to the pool) I just want to throw hissy fits of huge proportions.

I had been thinking, "Why do I insist on being healthy this time? Its so dumb! I hate it! I don't want to! I'm gonna be so mad having to do this until July!"

And then to make matters worse, J caught a cold, and didn't sleep at alll last night. (You see yesterday Blake and I made a game plan, to get me to the gym. It involved going to bed earlyish/on time, and then waking up at 6am.) I thought I was going to die last night, with how much she cried and how badly I wanted to sleep, and how terrible it was going to be to go to the gym.

But I made myself go because I knew if I didn't today, I'd find a way to not go all week, and then all month, and then we would have wasted all that money on the membership to the cool brand new Iowa State University Recreational Facilities.

Besides I had already hunted down a swimsuit that should fit me all the way till the end of this pregnancy.

-------------------------------------
Stores aren't carrying maternity suits yet (just online). (This is silly, I mean, don't pregnant ladies ever get to go to Florida or awesome Islands this time of year? Yes! Its not just crazy college kids! Take note, retailers! Take note!)
Anyway, so I ended up finding a cute long tankini at Kohls, and bought it a few sizes bigger to be safe. Its nice because their is a drawstring on each sides, so you can make it longer or shorter in the torso -- this will come in handy. (It gets very long, at least on short me, so I feel safe that it will fit for the whole pregnancy.)
I also really like the halfcircle patterned print, on the belly.
I was quite happy with the purchase, since I wasn't out looking for cute, I was just looking to keep the belly under wraps! But I ended up with both!

Shopping for yourself? Here's my suit

I felt like the top wasn't quite secure enough to feel carefree while lap swimming, so I bought a sports bra from Target, that is made out of what feels like swimsuit material, to layer it up.

I think it looks pretty normal under there. (I bought it in Black.) And, well if it doesn't, I don't care. It feels good and I get to work out.

(I've used this same type of sports bra in my non-pregnant, nursing days for swimming as well. My speedo-type lap suits doesn't have a bra in it. And with my nursing chest, I wanted one.  It has held up just as well as the swimsuit to all the repeated chlorine exposure and constant use. So if you are in a similar situation with your swim suit I'd totally suggest this bra to you.)

Buy one here

And I had a pair of black bottoms already.

-------------------------------------

So, I made myself go.

I hate new things, so I was all afraid of going and looking dumb not knowing where to find the locker rooms, and not having the feel for the way people swim in this pool, ect. 

That was the hardest part, convincing myself it would be ok if I looked dumb today.

Well, I got there found the locker room and it felt like was like I was the only one there. 

When I got to the pool, it was only me and the lifeguards.

I was in heaven. No more sharing lanes.

At my last pool it was always crowded, and we always had to share, or even wait to share.

Having the lane, and the whole pool, to myself was just the most relaxing thing in the world to me.

And I needed that relaxing time to myself.  I had been having some mommy burn out, mixed with emotional burn out with all the changes and new things from this move. When I got home I was a new mommy. Endorphins are my most under appreciated favorite thing! When I am full of them I never want to be with out them. When I am missing them I run from them like the plague. (Then I kick myself later for the nonsense!)

Before I got there I was a bit nervous about being totally out of shape from all the time off, plus the new baby weight. When I did the first few pases I did get winded and felt the emotional "oh no!" But I told myself I will stay in the pool 30 mins, and it doesn't matter how much I get accomplished. That was a good call. I was able to just kinda swim steadily without pressure after that. And I think I got a decent amount of laps in. (Didn't count.) By the end I was feel like I could stay in all day. But I was getting round ligament pain. And I didn't feel safe pushing things, since it has been so long since I've swam. If I wasn't protecting a new life, I would have totally pushed myself, but I wanted to be safe, so I called it a day. I think the pain is partially the twisting motion I do to move my arms, and partially the fact that I think my belly is in a growth spurt the last couple days. So I'm sure I was totally safe, I just wanted to be really sure!

I really like this gym facility. It's brand new and full of cool stuff.

When I was leaving I saw two girls running around the vortex pool. I was under the impression that it was a hot tub, but apparently you can work out in it. (I'm not sure if its hot or not during lap swimming.) Maybe one day I'll give that a whirl. (Wait that was punny. Total accident!)

And believe you me, all June (maybe even starting in May) you will definitely see me trying to walk the baby out with long bouts on one of their many treadmills or ellipticals. (I like ellipticals better, do those walk babies out just as well as treadmills? Hope so. I don't see why not!) {I do like swimming more, so I think I'll do both at the end.} As well as take J on many real walks. And........ do squats all day everyday. And.... then figure eights on a birth ball after my legs give out. All while eating handfuls of spicy peppers!!! This baby will definitely be welcomed out by anything I can think of! And my legs will be more toned than they ever have been in my whole life! At least I'll have that going for me, even if I can't get into labor again, I will have legs of steel!

Anyway,

I like my gym. And I am excited, to be excited to work out! 

21 Weeks Pregnant

The Belly:
Ok, so I'm a total weirdo and I started to wonder what size my belly actually was 3 days postpartum last time.  They say you come home from the hospital looking 5 months pregnant.  I swear I came home looking like a smooshy 6 1/2 months (there is a rather large difference in my pregnancy photos between 5 and 6 months).  So it dawned on me that I should measure myself this time and have an official ruling on just how pregnant I look when I am no longer pregnant.
Friends, do NOT fear.  This is sincerely a "scientific" investigation.  Not emotionally motivated at all  A purely random thought which occurred one day said that I could perhaps benefit the postpartum clothing line I one day "will" (probably won't) create and be famous for.
So don't worry I will not freak out when I find out I actually am looking 8 months pregnant 3 days postpartum.  I just want to know, for the hope of clothing future!

Anyway, that being said I started measuring my belly at 19.5 weeks.  (I know, dang it, why didn't this occur to me sooner!  It would have been better research!)

So since I started measuring, my belly has stayed the same circumference during these almost 3 weeks. 

(I know I haven't really been consistent with my weekly updates, so the weeks sound off.  I'll be 22 weeks on Tuesday.)

So I can officially say, with full authority, the belly is the same.  

But I feel it getting tighter.  So it feels more pregnant than last time we talked.  

And I fully expect it to have a number jump in circumference soon, when assessing my last pregnancy's photos.  From weeks 20 to 22.5 I looked a lot bigger.  So that has to be on its way right around the corner.  Although who knows, cause I looked bigger faster (at 19 weeks) this time than last.  (Ok yeah there really is no science to this!)

          

                                      2012                                                                    2010
                         

The mirror is dirty from hanging it. My face looks smeared. 

After our Valentine's Date

I wanted a photo with both of us, but Blake had to run back to work afterwards, so I didn't get one.

(This is my favorite maternity dress I've owned yet.  You can't see it in the photo very well, but there is like a rushed half circle around the belly.  Really cute!)

Weeks 19 and 20 and Moving

Since the past two weeks have been nothing but normal, I am gonna skip my normal format and just chat.

I was a little too busy for blogging, and I also didn't have internet until a day ago, so even if I had typed you wouldn't have seen it till now anyway.

I was also a little too busy to "be pregnant."  Well, obviously I can't really help but be pregnant, but I just didn't have the time to feel pregnant or think about anything to do with having a baby, other than the random occasional stressor that would pop into my mind in the midst of packing boxes---which I am sure was just happening to try and see if Lydia was going to crack.

So my pregnant thoughts were as follows:

MOVING!

So I don't have the time to be writing this, but I wanted to stop and say, everyone has been awesome. We've had the perfect amount of help. Thank you to all my friends and family!

Tomorrow morning 8am, Blake presents his final defense to complete his PhD.

That boy has earned it! 

LET ME TELL YOU!

He has EARNED it!

He's still a little nervous, and well its a big deal, so I understand.

So if you could be praying for him, we would love that!

And then we throw the last bit of stuff into the moving truck and car and move to Iowa.

{Super tons of emotions. No time to write them.}

And also,
I don't know how long it will take us to get the internet set up at our new place, so I may not get my update online this week. But I will take the picture!

I hope I see you soon!

Love,
Lydia