Tuesday, January 10, 2012

15 Weeks Pregnant

The Belly:
Over this week, some days I think "Yeah, I've definitely popped." But it doesn't always seem like it, especially in the dresses I'm still loving to wear. But I am showing more.
The bump is definitely lower, and sticking out forward, more than last time. Which for the time being, I kinda like. :)

I didn't get dressed in time to ask Blake to take the photo today, so this is what you get!

 It's still not the kind of showing where {when my hands aren't showing the definition} a stranger would know for sure its a baby and not cookies. So I'm starting to get those confused looks from passers by, trying to decide what's going on there.
I've gained about 6 or 7lbs now, {Two weeks into the second trimester} and I don't know how that sounds to you, but I'm really happy with that. I don't have a record of how I gained last time, but I know I'm much more on track this time around. (I think I gained between 8 - 10 lbs in the first trimester last time.) And that makes me happy since I'm really hoping to keep me and baby #2 in a healthy weight range -- praying for a simpler delivery.

I'm feeling a lot better than last week. I still had a couple headaches, but nothing that really affected my day. I still get really tired right around 4pm - 6pm; its my weary time. But the rest of the day is good. Overall, right now,  I don't feel pregnant.

This week the baby is hungry. Not for anything in particular. But I am hungry. I've found that its no good to try and eat myself to really-full in order to try and keep "the hungry" away. It doesn't work. Even if I stuff myself to overwhelmed, it won't be too long before I'm hungry again. (Which is not fun, since I'm in pain for a couple hours, and then bam I feel starving!) So I've tried to do my best to just kinda graze-eat. Just eat until I feel hunger relief and stop before I even really feel all that full, so it will be acceptable for me to eat again in a short amount of time.
Nothing in particular has sounded all that great, its kinda frustrating trying to pick out what to eat. Especially once I've gotten into the super-hungry zone and start getting illogical and emotional.

Baby:At the start of the week the baby was dancing up a storm, I was feeling flutters galore. Now at the end of the week all I've been feeling is this weird tightness, kinda pushing feeling, on occasion. I sort of want to blame it on gas or ligaments stretching, but it kind feels like when the baby is bigger and stretches out as hard as possible and makes your tummy stick out. I don't know if baby is big enough to accomplish that kind of sensation yet. (Obviously, they can't make my belly move at all. But its the same type of feeling.) He or she is suppose to be about the size of an avocado right now. Who knows.

Well this week was full of feelings. Blake was finishing up his dissertation. So the start of the week was rough. But we got it done. Phew.
Then the next day we headed out to Iowa to try and find a new place to live.
That was intense for me. Planning out the trip and trying to get all the places booked to look at was freaking me out. But what helped me was when I started to pretend I was a secretary and that I was planning this for my boss instead of myself. It took the emotion out of it and then I got really good at it!
I tried to use that technique while we were looking at the actual places, it didn't really help me so much. It was just really intense to think of how my life was going to change, all while trying to make huge decisions. I needed a paper bag to breathe in about five different times over the weekend. (Sadly I did not ever locate a paper bag, so I had to deal.)
It was hard to actually be there because it made the move real.
But I think we found a place, we are waiting to see if we are approved once our check {that's in the express mail} gets to them. We just hope that no one brings in a check into their office for the place before the mail man gets ours in to reserve it for us.
We went to a Church there in town on Sunday before we headed back, and we really liked it. Everyone  we talked to was really nice. We even got two offers for a babysitter for J, when baby #2 makes their grand entrance. Awesome!

She has become quite the talker this week. Honestly, I often don't know what she is saying because she is trying her darnedest to say more than her actual vocabulary. Which is really cute, but kinda frustrating for both of us, since she wants to be understood so badly, but its just not there yet.
But even when she's not desperate to say something specific, she just kinda likes to be saying things now throughout her day. I think its so cute, because she's never been all that into verbal-ness, she's always been more of a "do-er" so its sweet to see this side of her coming out.
She's also super polite, always saying unprompted thank-yous at the cutest most appropriate moments. She's melted my heart a couple times thanking me for things I wouldn't have expected thank yous for.

In other news, while Blake and I went to Iowa she stayed with my parents. This was the longest I've ever been away from her, and I teared up our first night away from her when I saw all these little girls at the restaurant.
Since she is still nursing, I brought my pump with me because I figured I would die without using it. But it turns out, I may not have needed to use it at all. I used it about 3 times just incase, but I basically got a half ounce out of each side. So I figured that my milk must be going away at this point.
Maybe I should have pumped more often while I was away to try and keep my supply up to speed. But I wasn't sure what J would think once I got back, I thought maybe she would be kinda less inclined to nurse now that she was free for 3 days.
Well the second she saw me when we got back she was asking for, "moak. moak." and when I said ok she cheered "yay!" throwing her arms in the air.
Its not been going that great. I really don't have a lot of milk left, and she is NOT pleased. From everything I've read, its pretty normal for this to happen sometime mid-pregnancy regardless of demand because of the hormone shift. So J's been a basket case with me last night through now. Scream crying for moak no matter how often I offer. We are trying to help her transition a bit easier with rice milk (we didn't think the soy was working well for her and she can't have dairy.) and she really likes it. But it doesn't always go so well when I offer it to her. So we will see what will happen. My mom thinks she will wean herself now, but I just don't know, since she is so determined to get moak at any cost!
I just hope I can stay patient and understand with her, since I know change is hard. I myself did some crying recently over hard changes in my life. I keep trying to remember how hard this move feels for me, to try and keep her transition in perspective.

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